It’s hard to know what to do when your child watches inappropriate things. One dad shares his thoughts about protecting children from pornography.

Discovering that your child has been exposed to inappropriate content, such as pornography, can be deeply upsetting. Many parents feel unsure of how to handle the situation—should you confront them? Punish them? Ignore it altogether?

At Betrayal Trauma Recovery (BTR), we understand the complex emotions and challenges that come with situations like these.

The reality is that these moments are opportunities to teach your child critical values that will shape how they view themselves, women, and relationships.

If you’re searching for information about this because you’re worried your husband is using pornography and your worried about when your child watches inappropriate things, you need support. Attend a Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group Session TODAY.

Why Should It Matter When Your Child Watches Inappropriate Things?

Pornography isn’t harmless. It often perpetuates violence against women, portraying them as objects rather than equals, and reinforces exploitative behaviors for monetary gain.

These messages will influence your child’s beliefs about gender roles, relationships, and power dynamics in harmful ways. Teaching them healthy perspectives at an early stage is crucial to them having healthy relationships.

Step 1: Stay Calm

Finding out your child has viewed inappropriate content can be triggering, especially if you’ve experienced betrayal trauma in your own marriage. However, staying calm is essential. Overreacting can shut down communication and make your child less likely to come to you in the future.

Instead, approach the situation with understanding and curiosity. A conversation might start like this:

• “I noticed you came across something online that may seem confusing or upsetting. Can we talk about it?”

By fostering an open dialogue, you establish trust and create a safe space for them to express themselves.

Step 2: Teach Them to Be Feminists

Teaching boys to respect women as equals is one of the most effective ways to combat the negative influences of pornography.

Explain the importance of empathy, integrity, and valuing everyone as a person, not an object. Discuss what respect means in the context of friendships, relationships, and society. Share examples of strong women in your life or history who inspire you—they’ll start to understand the importance of equality in everyday life.

If you’re experiencing emotional abuse in your own home, it will affect your kids. So learning strategies to keep yourself safe is important. Enroll in The Betrayal Trauma Recovery Living Free Workshop to learn these emotional safety strategies.

Step 3: Explain How Women Are Exploited

Help your child understand the grim reality of the pornography industry. Many videos online feature individuals who have been coerced, manipulated, or abused. Explain how exploitation often fuels these depictions, and why making ethical choices online matters.

For example, you could say:

• “A lot of people in those videos are hurt or taken advantage of. Watching that kind of content supports something very harmful to others.”

Shining a light on the exploitation behind pornography can help children grasp its consequences, fostering a sense of responsibility and compassion.

Step 4: Teach Them Media Literacy

The internet is full of content engineered to manipulate and desensitize users. Equip your child with the tools to critically evaluate what they see online. Teach them:

• How algorithms work to feed suggestive content.
• The importance of questioning the authenticity of what they see.
• That their choices online reflect and shape their values.

When your child learns to think critically about what they’re exposed to, they gain the ability to make more informed decisions.

Step 5: Create a Safe, Porn-Free Environment at Home

If your child stumbled upon inappropriate content because of your partner’s pornography use, it’s essential to address this issue on a family level. Some helpful first steps include:

• Using parental controls and content filters on household devices.
• Having regular conversations about internet safety.
• Setting clear family rules about technology use.

Remember, a safe home starts with respect from all family members, including spouses.

Step 6: Model Healthy Behavior

Children absorb as much from what they see as from what they hear. Demonstrate mutual respect, healthy boundaries, and compassionate relationships in your daily interactions.

If you’re in a challenging situation with a partner who uses pornography, listen to The Free Betrayal Trauma Recovery Podcast to learn more about how to keep your children safe from inappropriate things.

Support for Mothers Concerned About Their Families

At BTR, we understand the heartbreaking effects of a partner’s pornography use and the challenge of raising children in a world rife with inappropriate content. Our mission is to empower mothers to foster healthy, respectful environments for their families.

If you’re struggling with your husband’s pornography use and are concerned about its influence on your children, our Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group Sessions are here for you. These live, daily sessions offer the validation, encouragement, and practical support you need to create a safer, healthier home.

You don’t have to face this alone. Together, we create homes where respect, equality, and emotional safety thrive.

Transcript: What To Do When Your Child Watches Inappropriate Things